Along the roads of my heart I walked till the horizon of my memories to understand if I could ever reach there. I was climbing the wall of my dreams when I found out that it was never a wall which I pretended to climb and rather an usual stone! What astonished me is not the fact that I didn’t realise about my feet being placed on a stone or sticking by the wall, it is the depth of my belief which did not stop me to feel I was elsewhere and made me strong to continue ahead. Someone once told me that we as ‘humans are so inhuman’, sounds ironical to comprehend but apparently puts forth the meaning of life. A plant who tries to settle the mud and hope to grow next to the plant which was planted already can ask for more space to be comfortable, can absorb more water which is sprinkled on both of them at the same time, can push it away to grow fast but would certainly not leave the plant to die alone, not because it wont have someone to be dominant in front of,not because it wont be able to ask for more favours but only because it grew with it and became what it made it so what happens if even for a second, a minute, a day or maybe no longer time, matters to it irrespective of its weird nature as a neighbouring plant. I summoned all my strength to fight and fight until I survived the battle of my own self, the one with the mini me who rules my mind and my heart. Emotions they say they are but are they really worth to give them a face off in life. I am not heartbroken, neither I am depressed but it is a deep contemplation to go ahead with it I actually matter for that 0.001 % chance to withstand what I could be and I am asked to mind my own life. Maybe I am just thinking too much and trying to reach too far which doesnt even have a pull to support my vision as I could not be so trustworthy earlier to be helped now or maybe it doesnt need me anymore. While I would figure out myself again, I would be a mess and infect the ones who hates it and leave me and go. It is so easy, isn’t it to enjoy the aftermath because it is what I asked for and deserved. Didnt I? When now I couldn’t find the point to end my walk, I decide to sit here and keep searching until I discover another memory as you dont lose some things ever because they take time to be moulded and breaking it demands the unreal you and which I am not made up of. I understand that maybe I was meant to be short lived and now it doesn’t matter,does it?
0 Comments